Category Archives: Adventures In Babysitting

Haiku 1038

They went back to sleep
Sitting alone at the phone
Enjoying the peace

Posted from my phone.


Untitled #403

The sprinklers turn on
The empty quad fills
A dozen screaming vermin
Chasing through the streams
Appear in an instant
A rainbow of hues
Peals of laughter
A choir of cacophony
Assaults my ears
As I laugh alongside
You can’t pay for entertainment like this

Untitled #402

Babysitting again
Watching Kenzie eat a popsicle
And watching Hell on Wheels
Soon she’ll be done
And out to the quad we’ll go
Orange sunlight
Smoke from forest fires
Burning near my heart
Stains the world bloody
As sticky fingers
Shove frozen fruit juice
Into clown mouth
And dirty toes dance
The clown and I

Adventures In Babysitting 10: Haiku

Pizza Pops for lunch
Nuking in the microwave
Kenzie’s a robot

Tough Love

It’s a nice warm day
We’re in the quad to play
Watching all the young ‘uns run
Laughing, screaming, having fun
One taps me on the leg: “Tag! You’re it!”
I shamble about chasing kids for a bit
I catch a girl and give her a flip
Her skirt flies open: bare ass and shit
I set her down
Chase the next one
And so on

But it got me to thinking
For me, no big deal, just stinking
For another it might be temptation
To pluck young fruit before it’s gestation
And all the real perverts out there
Of whom we’re totally unaware

Parents! Please be aware!
Make sure your kids wear underwear!
Teach them how to wipe their ass
So they don’t get shit on the grass
Don’t dress 5 year old girls like sluts
They might end up with gaping butts

Adventures In Babysitting

Makenzie’s running laps
Round and round the central division
Every once in a while a collision
As she baps
Into a wall
She even took a fall
But with every lap
She gives my palm a tap
She’s up to twenty seven
Her steps are getting leaden
Her breath is coming in gasps
Until at last
She’s run herself out
Maybe now she’ll take a nap